Eh.....

Well, today was....interesting. I am starting to think that I don't really like my personality very much. I feel so pesimistic all the time and I can't seem to shake the feelings here recently. I am growing suspicious of someone and that is what is bugging me the most. I feel that they aren't being completely honest with me and I have done my very best to be completely honest with them. It pisses me off to absolutely no end

Idk why I keep feeling this way but I hope that I get over it soon. I hate the fact that I feel this way, because I am having these feelings toward someone that I care about deeply. It's just....rediculous.

Well other than my annoying bipersonality, I had a realatively good day. I enjoyed track practice, and that comes off as a shock to me. Since when have I ever enjoyed a practice??? Um, idk, lemmie think...um, NEVER!!!! haha wow.

To be honest, I am sooo not ready for this math test tomorrow. I don't think i've been this ill-prepared for a test in a long time.... Kinda depressing to say the least....

One of those days that go from being a reasonably good day, to a rather depressing one...

Alright, well today was a fairly good day. I was somewhat prepared for it, but the only thing that I wasn't prepared for was my Algebra II class. I am so far behind in that class that it's not even funny. It went somewhat better than what I expected though. In the itroduction of the last section of the chapter, I finally understood something out of the entire thing. I thought that that was amazing. So, unfortuantely, the small feeling of gratification was short lived. As I got up to leave the classroom, that all too familiar feeling of the fact that I had almost every assignment in that class not turned in or whatever struck me, and it struck hard.

After all that and figuring out what I needed to do to fix the problem in my Study Skills Class the next hour, I felt somewhat releived. Today was the first day of Track. It went well, and I did pretty well. I left for home fairly satisfied with my performance...

When I got home, I felt totally exhausted. I could hardly keep myself from falling asleep but I managed to pull it off. I cleaned up and had dinner and went to work on trying to ease my frustration and depressiveness on a video game, and I finally got the guts to try and find out why facebook was acting the way it was. I never did figure out the problem, but I did however, figure out how to run Internet Expolorer in a different way. That way, I had sort of fixed the problem, could use my chat properly, and among other things as well. (I happened to notice that fact that it was just facebook that was affected, not any of the other sites that I visit. My mom's laptop worked fine too so it was just my laptop and facebook itself I suppose).

After all that, I had the opportunity to talk with that special someone. I am rather discombobulated. I hada rather nice conversation with her, but when I mentioned a certain thing, idk if it was just me, but I got the feeling that it might have creeped her out or somethig. That troubles me to no end when I get that feeling, as I can't alwasy tell whether or not it's true. Idk, sometimes I feel like I try to hard. I've been told that before, so I assume that it's most likely true in this circumstance. I wish that it werent't, as I mentioned before, I really don't want to screw this up. It's just way too important to me.

Well, that's all for now I suppose.... I hope that tomorrow is better... :(

Finally, The One...I hope! :D

Alright, so finally I think that I might have found the right girl. She's cute, funny, and absolutely adorable in every way! I absolutely love her smile. It gives me such a warm feeling every time I make her smile. She's so smart. I've never known anyone as smart as her.  She's such a spiritually strong girl that it makes me wish that I wa a better person evey time I hear her testimony. Even though it's been a long time since I've heard her bear her testimony, I can still remember it and I wish that I could hear it more often. Every time I hear her, or I see her, I get that feeling in my chest that I'm happy and safe. I always feel safe with her. As strange as it sounds, I always get that light-headed, weak-kneed feeling when I'm around her.

 I don't know how many times that I have felt this way before. All I know is, this feeling is so much stronger, and I have never been so sure until now. I've done a lot of praying about it so know that I am on track.

I am sad though. I told her how I felt, and she asked for some time to think on it so I granted her wish. After giving her time, she told me that she was flattered and that she wanted to just be friends for now. I understand that. She is homeschooled. We hardly ever see each other. The only time that we ever really talk is on Facebook. She has a very busy life. She simply doesn't have the time to talk to me every single minute of every single day, and I'm cool with that.

I just hope that I  don't end up screwing this up. I've done that so many times where I've had the opportunity to have a really good relationship with someone. I am very excited though. On the 25th of May, she and one of her friends are holding a Fundraising Ball for their group, "Still-To-Be-Named Shakespeare Group," and I asked her to Prom and she told me yes! There are some big opportunities for us to get to know each other better and create some memories. Also, she's never been to Prom before. This is exceptionally fortunate for me, since it is my honor to take the love of my life to her and my first Prom. I hope that she has a good time and that She really remembers this always as something to tell when she gets older. The feeling that I get when I have the opportunity to touch others' lives and make others' feel better is overwhelming.

I miss her terribly!! I only wish that these events would come sooner, as I don't know how long I can keep the intense emotion of love from driving me insane... I honestly couldn't be happier with life right now though. Other than the fact that my math grade sucks and it's totally and completely ruining my life, the above still stands! ha That's all for now! :)

Idaho Statewide Protest: the Education Crisis

So recently I had heard about a group on facebook on the Idaho Statewide Walk Out. Basically, what this argument is centered on is the fact that Tom Luna is trying to pass a bill extending graduation requirements. Additionally, four online classes, teachers tenure cut, greater class sizes, etc....

Personally, I am agains this becasue I don't want to have to do this to graduate. Now, I know that I'll be a Senior next year and all that... but I'm more concerned about my sister having to live with these adjustments. I don't feel that it is fair, and they are just flat out ignoring the adolecsent protestors and what not... Ya sure, "children are to be seen and not heard" well, in this case, I could really care less about that phrase. We have rights as well, and I think that our opinion matters.

This is just one of the many subjects that I have a serious problem with, namely the Tax Hikes are what really get my gander up.

So I would like to hear some opinions on what people think. What do you think?
Are you for the Bill?
Are you against it?
Is it the right way to handle things?
How can it be improved?